A LITTLE INCIDENT Lu Hsun

Six years have gone by, as so many winks, since I came to the capital from the village. During all that time there have occurred many of those events known as “affairs of the state”, a great number of which I have seen or heard about. My heart does not seem to have been in the least affected by any of them, and recollection now only tends to increase my ill temper and cause me to like people less as the day wears on. But one little incident alone is deep with meaning to me, and I am unable to forget it even now.

It was a winter day in the sixth year of the Republic, and a strong northernly wind blew furiously. To make a living, I had to be up early, and on the way to my duties I encountered scarcely anyone. After much difficulty, I finally succeeded in hiring a rickshaw. I told the puller to take to me to the South Gate.

After a while, the wind moderated its fury, and in its wake the streets were left clean of the loose dust. The puller ran quickly. Just as we approached the South Gate, somebody ran in front of us, got entangled in the rickshaw, and tumbled to the ground.

It was a woman with streaks of white in her hair, and she wore ragged clothes. She had darted suddenly from the side of the street, and directly crossed in front of us. My puller tried to swerve aside, but her tattered jacket, unbuttoned and fluttering in the wind, caught in the shafts. Fortunately, the puller had slowed his pace, otherwise she would have been thrown head over heels, and probably injured. After we halted, the woman still knelt on all fours. I did not think she was hurt. No one else had seen the collision. And it irritated me that the puller had stopped and was apparently prepared to get himself involved in some foolish complication. It might delay and trouble my journey.

“It’s nothing,” I told him. “Move on!”

But either he did not hear me or did not care, for he put down the shafts and gently helped the old woman to her feet. He held her arms, supporting her, and asked:

“Are you alright?”

“I am hurt.”

I thought, “I saw you fall and it was not all rough. How can you be hurt? You are pretending. The whole business is distasteful, and the rickshaw man is merely making difficulties for himself. Now let him find his own way out of the mess.”

But the puller did not hesitate for a moment after the old woman said she was injured. Still holding her arm, he walked carefully ahead with her. Then I was surprised as, looking ahead, I suddenly noticed a police station, and saw that he was taking her there. No one was outside, so he guided her in through the gate.

As they passed in, I experienced a curious sensation. I do not know why, but at the moment, it suddenly seemed to me that his dust-covered figure loomed enormous, and as he walked farther he continued to grow, until finally I had to lift my head to follow him. At the same time, I felt a bodily pressure all over me, which came from his direction. It seemed almost to push out from me all the littleness that hid under my fur-lined gown. I grew week, as though my vitality had been spent, as though the blood had frozen in me. I sat motionless, stunned and thoughtless, until I saw an officer emerge from the station. Then, I got off from the rickshaw as he approached me.

“Get another rickshaw,” he advised. “This man can’t pull you anymore.”

Without thinking, I thrust my hand into my pocket and pulled forth a big fistful of coppers. “Give the fellow these,” I said.

The wind had ceased entirely, but the street was still quiet. I mused as I walked, but I was almost afraid to think about myself. Leaving aside what had happened before, I sought an explanation for a fistful of coppers. Why had I given them? As a reward? And did I think of myself, after my conduct, fit to pass judgment upon the rickshaw puller? I could not answer my own conscience.

Till now that experience burns in my memory. I think of it, and introspect with pain and effort. The political and military drama of these years is to me like the classics I read in childhood: I cannot recite half a line of it. But always before my eyes, purging me with shame, impelling me to better myself, invigorating my hope and courage, this little incident is reenacted. I see it in every detail as distinctly as on the day it happened.